The Adventures of A Lagos Boy: Igando

Adventure 1: The time we went for JAMB registration 

(POV of a Legedis Benz Early 2000s model)

That fateful day, 23 of February, 2022 was particularly stressful. It was as if Igando itself was determined to frustrate the heck out of us. There are a number of adventurer’s advice (pro tips) here since it was a massive teaching experience.

Pro tip#1: Always have extra cash with you.

With the initial plan, I was supposed to spend at most ₦300. I ended up spending over ₦1k.

Let me break it down for you.

We’d decided; Abigail, Fatima, Mojola and I would go to register at a Jamb centre that Abi had already chosen for us (which was at Egbeda). “To our pleasant surprise” when we got to the building complex, we were given the low down. They had moved to Igando. I mean who moves all the way from Egbeda to the inner trenches in Igando? The math is not mathing. I guess some things are just beyond me.

Pro tip#2: Don’t trust a Nigerian’s directions a 100% (Just check Google maps to be sure)

Obviously when we found out that they had moved, we were oozing confusion. Category; Lost. It was giving; “God abeg oh, who go help oh?” Then came along this nice man that offered to help out. “They have good network today, see these people that just came from there, he said. In retrospect I think back, if only we knew what was ahead of us. By his directions, we would take a bus to Igando Police station, take a left and we would see their new location. Technically, it was indeed a left, but a left through a market, a long winding maruwa/okada ride and a brief walk through the trenches. That’s why it’s important to follow tip 1 to the bone.

Pro tip #3: At least have someone with a general scope of where you are going. (Someone with extensive public transport experience)

You might want to write that down…..

In our little group, I was the only one who had gone that far ever. So I had the most knowledge of the area. Even at that, we were a little lost.

Pro tip #4: Ask around for info, especially from responsible people

The thing with asking for directions is that you can fairly guess if the person knows what their saying. We had the centre’s flier with us (the man gave us) and a woman on the same bus was heading in that direction, so she showed us the way. (God bless her soul)

Pro tip #5: Once you know where you are going, stick to it. Avoid distractions.

Let me give you a bit of context. A member of the group (I won’t mention her name to save her from some embarrassment, but you can take a guess in the comment section) decided to get sidetracked. That was how a man selling glasses called this babe to buy. Can you believe that she actually went to buy the sha-commneded glasses? Wetin Musa no go see for gate! Smh.

Pro tip #6: Know how to price.

That’s how we were almost cheated by this Maruwa man. As I said earlier, we gave massive lost vibes. So he tried to take advantage of that fact. Something that’s ₦150 , he wanted to collect ₦200/250. If you want to know the breakdown of pricing, check out our blog post on it!

Pro tip #7: Don’t be afraid to walk the walk

Tbh, I don’t know why this is even a tip. Even after we got to the street of the centre, we were presented with another obstacle. Their signs were wrong. They had a two signs with arrows pointing in the opposite direction. Like wth? As you can probably guess, we ended up taking the wrong path. Ughhhh

Pro tip #8 : Move with the flow

Sounds like a quote they would say in a martial arts movie.

At the point where we finally reached the destination, in usual fashion we were faced with another problem. They don’t accept cash. This is basic information that they should have put on their flyer. *sobs* (reference to tip #4)

Pro tip #9 : The patient dog gets to register for JAMB

(see what I did there? *wink, wink*)

After the payment issues were sorted, we started filling forms and generating profile codes. Three out of the four of us had gotten our profile codes earlier, but she was having issues. Turns out the number she needed to generate the code was (get this) her brother’s girlfriend’s number. (proceeds to laugh hysterically). To add more fuel to flame, when we ready to register, there was no network.

Pro tip #10: If it wasn’t obvious already; Always be prepared

ATM cards, power banks, airtime, have it all in the case of the unexpected . Our dear babe had none of these. But we do indeed serve a good God and Papa came through, she got her code.

Pro tip #11: Do your research

Let’s say you are on an adventure (same as we were), you don’t just go searching for a treasure without a map and determining all the possible outcomes. I feel that it should be better announced that you need a softcopy of your WAEC results for registration. One of us, (a different babe this time) didn’t have hers. There were two options; wait for someone to send it, or come back another day. Let’s be honest no one would want to go through all that wahala again. The rest of us had ours by happenstance, not like we knew it was required.

Pro tip #12: After a series of unlucky events, there’s always a lucky break.

Eventually, we were all successfully registered. FINALLY!

Pro tip #13: Avoid Billing

That was how they guys that registered us where like we should help them find something you get. Of course, disciplined comrades such as ourselves avoided it.

Pro tip #14: Lagos can be crazy, so once in a while show them werey.

On our way back home, after many hours, we passed through the market, (reference to story under tip #2)

These are the three people I strongly dislike in the market.

• Those who walk slowly. Uncle, you won’t be the first or last person to walk on the road, so abeg don’t delay others. Unless you wan collect.
• Those who just stop randomly. When you are not going through something, why would you stop in the middle of the road. Especially the ones that stop to check their phones. You’ll tell me if your fam dropped the road there.
• The sellers who touch you and try to convince you to patronize them. When this happens, slap their hand, give them as e dey hot.

At around 6pm ish we got home.

Time for some Q&A

Q: What was your favourite part of the adventure?

Fatima: My favourite part was when we took pictures and played music, after we were all done with registration.

Abigail: Spending time with the group.

Q: Most stressful part?

Abigail: The distance.

Fatima: Getting there and passing through the market.

Mojola: Passing through the market with the police men waving their guns

Q: What did you learn/ what you can’t forget?

Fatima: Nothing Lol

Abigail: The fact that I almost wasn’t able to register. I almost cried ehn.

Tune in for more adventures from this side!

Afro Teens cares
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